“Fall is a season for change”…so cliché. But also true. I’ve been trying to wrap my head around this whole “living-in-a-new-place-and-doing-everything-on-my-own” thing. It’s quite the change. It’s funny because I remember this time last year I was so damn anxious to get on with the rest of my life. I was having a blast being in school, not working (for once), going out with my friends 24/7, and actually enjoying my classes because I had time to study. But I was so ready to see where the next chapter of my life would take me. I wanted to know where I would end up living after graduation, which company I’d be working for, what my job would be like…if my degree that I worked my ass off for would end up being worthwhile.
And here I am. Approximately 1 year later and wishing more than anything that I could go back to my college days. I know, everyone says that. Everyone says “your college years will be the best years of your life”. I get it. But it’s so, SO true. At least compared to your first year working in the “real world”. And looking into the future only looks more stressful. Enjoyable and wonderful, yes. But stressful and expensive.
Don’t get me wrong, being in the working world isn’t all that bad. You make way more money than you did at your part-time college job. You (hopefully) get to do something that interests you every day. And…yeah that’s about it. Just kidding, it’s not that bad. Kind of.
I mean, let’s face it. 22 is such an awkward age. Half of the people I know from school are getting married and/or having kids at this point. And the other half are either still in school or focusing on readjusting to working in the real world….and some people have absolutely no idea what they’re doing with their lives. There comes a point in life where you have to stop looking back on the past and stop trying to plan for the future. There is so much beauty in focusing on the present…if only we were all a little better at that.
Speaking of he present, there are like a million and a half things I told myself I would have accomplished or started working on by now. I told myself that after college I would do some soul searching and “really find out what life is all about”. Yet we’re all always doing that and probably will be until the day we die. Let’s face it, no one really knows what the hell they’re actually supposed to be doing with their life.
Like, for example, I told myself that I would have taken up yoga by now and would go to 2-3 classes every single week – partly for the physical aspect of it and partly for the spiritual reflection. Nope, still haven’t done that, and actually stopped going to the gym every day like I used to because the real world gets stressful and sometimes a girl just needs to sit on the couch and not do a damn thing. I need to remember the sometimes part. J I also wanted to start playing piano regularly again. Problem is, I have my keyboard and no power cord or stand because it got lost during my move out here. So there’s that.
I guess I’m starting to realize that maybe putting a million things on my plate in addition to starting a new job and moving to a completely new place might have been a bit of a stretch for my personal psyche to handle. For now, I’ll just stick to getting through the workweeks and starting to work out again. There is a time for everything – we’ve got to give ourselves a chance to enjoy our time in the now.